palm in the vat 13 october, 2000 by johnmichael patrick monty monteith

In the geek team meeting today, at the lovely building that pays the bills, we decided to imitate Descartes for a few hours. The issue was not quite brain in the vat material, but far more interesting to a bunch of computer nerds and wannabe computer dweebs. Recently the office Geeks doled out to the masses of "Need To Have What The Other Guy Has" groupies some delicious new Handspring Visor PDA's. In fact, these Palm devices are damn useful if you do any information collection of any sort. Nonetheless, a question arose from all of this: How would Descartes separate the Palm in the work vat from the Palm outside the work vat?

Let me explain .. The whole point of Palm devices and all PDA's is for staff to be able to access and disseminate information no matter where they are. If this goal is to be met, that means that these devices must be carried everywhere at all times. If that goal is to be met, these devices must replace the personal information management tools already in use (calendars, address books, etc.) If that goal is to be met, these devices will be storing and accessing as much personal data as they do business data. So, what the Handspring Mission appears to be is the complete assimilation of an employee's personal home information with work information. From there it is a slippery slope to the merging of personal life with employment life. Where does the separation end? Ay, there's the rub.

A few of the highlight philosophical issues for you to chew on in Geek Philosophy 301:

These devices are owned by the company, and to be used for business purposes. However, they are devices inherently designed to be used outside of the building, and therefore often during non-working time. Is it right for an employer to expect an employee to give up their personal informational space? And if we truly believe that we need to separate our work from our home lives, why the hell are we so anxious to go down this path? I have yet to hand out one of these PDA devices to anyone who did not get a positively giddy look in their eyes. Are we nuts? Do we realize what we are giving up? I mean, at least I had an excuse when I got that giddy look.. It was a new electronic toy. What is a computer dweeb to do?

It is also inherently assumed that the employee will be carrying around a device with work information at all times, and therefore carries the assumption that this device must also then carry personal information. If it is acceptable for an employee to give up the separation between their personal lives and their employment life, can we therefore conclude the merging of private and work information is also acceptable? And how does one resolve the inherent problem of ownership of data? Keep in mind that most employers link these devices to Microsoft Outlook at the office (and it is likely the employee links it with their home version of Outlook to collect their personal data). When that sync takes place at work, all of the information, both personal and work related, gets sent to the Outlook pst file at work, and is backed up onto the Exchange Server. Therefore that personal data is now on the employer's information system, and likely is backed up onto employer backup tapes. That data can be disseminated by the employer (more importantly, the Information Systems Department staff) at any time. Are you ready to allow the geek boys in the basement to go through all of your personal contacts, notes, and calendar information?

Fortunately, if other companies are like ours, the geek boys in the basement not only do not care about your personal information, they do not have time to go through it even if they did care. After all - we are geeks, and geeks shall inherit the Earth. With the Earth at our disposal, your dentist appointments are not of particular interest to us.

But there are obviously large issues at play here. Clearly those slightly faint at heart (read: paranoid freaks) will eventually figure out that their personal information could be posted on the company Intranet for everyone to read. How will companies resolve the backlash?

Yet, let us not forget that the problems are not one sides. There are significant annoyances for the employer, as well. It is highly likely that an employee, when leaving their place of employment, will believe all of the information on their electronic wonder-pad is their own and must therefore go with them. Even if they are kind enough to surrender said personal device, how will the employer resolve that all of their proprietary information has been synced onto the employee's home computer and therefore is out of their possession? Or perhaps the employee bought a $150 Palm device, walked into work on their last day, synced up their new unit, and handed over the old one, thereby walking away from the office with company information and secrets. Keep in mind, they have every right to do so since what they collected also included personal information, for which the employer also retains a copy.

If you are an attorney, you must be absolutely salivating all over your Armani suit by now.

Believe it or not, there is an even bigger issue for the employer to ponder. While we are merging our private lives with our careers, the employer must understand that personal lives will now become an even greater part of the workplace. If we are expecting employees to give up their private lives by carrying around and using work information during non-work times, it must also be expected that the employer will allow private lives to infiltrate the work place. That means not only personal information that will need to be stored on employer information systems, but allowing employees to use Internet connections and employer workstations for conducting personal business. Is the employer willing to allow this? Most signs have been 'no', but if this merge is going to be a happy one, they will have to.

As you may have noticed, like Descartes, I have provided you with many questions and very few answers. And the few answers I have given are vague and relatively useless. I am a quick study on philosophical methods. In my next discussion we will discuss the Ontological Argument and how if He exists, then He must be Bill Gates. Until then, I hope you find better answers than I have.